Aside from the fact I'll be arrested one of these days for single-handedly making a valued artist go broke (or that's what the RIAA wants us to believe, anyway).

A couple girls from work wanted an eighties hair band mixed CD, and made the mistake of asking me to make one. So, thanks to the miracle of Limewire and a CD burner, I have made The Greatest 80s Hair Band Mix CD Ever (tm). No, seriously. Track list:

1. Quiet Riot -- Cum On, Feel The Noize
2. Europe -- The Final Countdown
3. Foreigner -- I Wanna Know What Love Is
4. Great White -- Once Bitten, Twice Shy
5. 38 Special -- Hold On Loosely
6. Motley Crue -- Dr. Feelgood
7. Night Ranger -- Sister Christian
8. Warrant -- Cherry Pie
9. Cutting Crew -- Died in Your Arms
10. Poison -- Nothin' But a Good Time
11. Damn Yankees -- High Enough
12. Winger -- Seventeen
13. Bon Jovi -- You Give Love A Bad Name
14. Cinderella -- Nobody's Fool
15. Def Leppard -- Bringin' on the Heartbreak
16. Whitesnake -- Here I Go Again
17. Firehouse -- When I Look Into Your Eyes
18. Scorpions -- Rock You Like a Hurricane
19. Judas Priest -- You've Got Another Thing Comin'
20. Guns N' Roses -- Paradise City *

I dare you to tell me you don't envy this bad boy right here.

* -- Yeah, I know this was technically a 90s song, being released in 1990, but you know what? I don't care, because it's a great song and GnR will always be an honorary hair band in my eyes. In other words, eat me.

Welcome to Hell, ladies and gentlemen.

So Justin and I have had our theories about this one dude at work, who's honestly more of a girl than the post-op tranny who joined us recently (yeah, we've got a bit of everything at Client Logic). We used to see him sneaking off on break with another guy, and apparently they've been getting braver because sometime over the weekend, somehow I missed the drama of BoyToy getting caught giving Girly Boy head in the stairwell. And not on the ground floor back where the pipes are and it's hard to see and dimly lit and you could hide very easily, nooo, but RIGHT IN THE FUCKING STAIRWELL between the fifth and fourth floors. *facepalm*

You know, there are more people who get fired from my job for having sex in the stairwells than anything else, I'm really beginning to think.

This is a real conversation between myself and a coworker today:

Me: You know how nuns say they're married to God?
Justin: Yeah...?
Me: Well, let's say after a while a nun decides she doesn't like it anymore and quits. Does she have to get a divorce?
Justin: ...
Me: I mean, can you imagine taking God to court? And does that mean she gets, like, half the earth?
Justin: She'd have a hard time finding a lawyer to go against him, you know.
Me: Yeah. And what if he lost? Can you imagine the plagues and shit?
Justin: It'd be quite nasty, yes.
Me: It'd show up on the front page of that one tabloid -- what's it called, the one that always says it's the end of the world and, oh yeah, Moth-Man is actually Angelina Jolie's child?
Justin: World Weekly News.
Me: Yeah, it'd be on the cover of that one: "GOD SPURNED BY FORMER LOVE: UNLEASHES SEVEN DEADLY PLAGUES ON WORLD. PLUS, WOMAN ATTACKED BY UNDEAD FUR COAT!"

Mark my words, I will work this into a story someday.

...One of my supervisors at work just emailed me a song that's the most godawful "metal" song ever, called "I Like Dirt." It goes something like this: I like dirt! Between my toes! I like dirt! Even up my nose!

Clearly I need to find a new job.

I'm consistently amazed by the number of people who call in with no clue how to work a coffee maker. I'm equally as amazed that they know how to use a telephone. I have to wonder at the ethics of my company when we routinely send these same people devices with which they can -- and likely will -- burn their houses down. I mean, tell me what you would do in this scenario: You open the top of the coffee maker and see the filter basket and the hole in the back for the water reservoir. You know and admit that you know it doesn't go into the filter basket. Yet you continue to wonder where the water goes. Where would YOU put it?

Yeah, these are the kinds of questions I answer for eight hours a day, every day.

I really like this song. In fact, the entire new CD is awesome. I never liked the first one, and the second one was okay but nothing special, but I think she's finally found her niche. She does 80s throwback so much better than Gwen Stefani, it's insane. Pains me to say, too, but whatever.

Oh, and Justin and I also got into an argument today re: Darth Vader. I insisted that Darth Vader is The Ultimate Bad-Ass(tm). Justin never really argued that point, but he did say that he wasn't impressed with DV's badassery in the original trilogy. I contest that it's exactly because we don't see much of him that we know how truly badass he really is, because when we do see him he's always doing something nasty to someone. Finally I went, "Dude, he fried a school full of Jedi KIDS. That's like, killing blind babies, man." And, after consulting three supervisors and a random assortment of coworkers, I won the war.

Come on. You don't eff with Darth Vader.

So Nikki and I went to see Pirates Sunday night and omg. *diesandisdead* So many pretty, pretty people. I'm officially in love with Norrington now, kthnx.

I've been selling things on Amazon's Marketplace lately, and so far the most interesting happening is that some judge in Miami bought my Tyrannasaurus Hives CD, even had me mail it to his chambers and everything. That gave me a good giggle.

The new Vines CD is amazing, by the by. Much more mellow than their last one, and they're starting to fully embrace the weird Beatles/Nirvana thing they've got going on. It's nice.

My chemistry book for next semester is $111. USED. *cowers in tehfearzomg*

Speaking of school, this is mostly just here for my reference, but if you're really terribly interested to see what I'm taking next semester, you can do so ( here )

In other news, I'm desperately trying to get rid of my current cell phone and plan, mostly because A) the phone sucks and B) I hate WV Wireless with the burning intensity of a thousand suns. So I emailed their customer service to ask about cancelling the account. ( Read my pain, yo. )

And also in other news, I don't believe I've mentioned here but Pippin's a daddy omg *diesoftehcute* That is all.

Because everyone else was doing it, and I needed an easier way to hunt down tutorials I've saved. Let it be known though that I did not make any of these icons! They're just here as a quick reference tool. Mmkay.

( Huge ass tutorial list. )

And Nicole wanted pictures for proof, so ( here we go. )

Because I downloaded it omg I'm a pirate yarrr acquired it electronically and ungh. unghunghungh. At least things are finally starting to make sense. And DESMOND. <3333 My Desmond is back, folks, yo. Love me some crazy hot Scottish guys. Clearly.

Also? Charlie/Claire 4 lyfe, fo realz. Or something. I'm not a shipper, not in the strictest sense, but they're adorable together.

I didn't realize that when I got my Best Buy card to put my car stereo on it, that they had a "same as cash" policy thing on it. I actually bothered to *read* the statement today though when it came in the mail and noticed that that promotion expires on 6/22, which means to date I haven't had to pay any finance charges on it. Had I actually bothered to read that sooner, I would have paid more than the minimum on the card each billing period. BAH. I mean, true, I really didn't have the money to pay any more than the $10, but whatever. It's the principle of the thing. I think.

I also electronically acquired X3 last night and have since been capping the hell out of it. The quality's really shitty, obviously, but that's why my electronically acquired Photoshop is for. *nodnod*

That's...really all I have to say. Fascinating.

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( SPOILERS AHEAD. )

God help me, but this whole Cena + Hunter + Edge snarkfest = TEH GOLD.

Seriously.

Someone kill me, please.

So I skipped class today because they were filming that damned movie right in front of the building and fuck me if I could actually find a way inside, so I said screw it and decided I'd much rather spend the next hour and a half waiting at the DMV office to get the title changed on the car and get my tags and everything. Feh. GREAT.

!!!!

I just realized how very close the opening of the new X-Men movie is! May 26, everyone, mark your calendars. Thank you, comingsoon.net! I also see that On a Clear Day was released (limited, granted) on 4/7 and heee, so so good. A lovely RP partner of mine downloaded it and send me a DVD copy, and ungh, my Billeh. So adorable. Great movie on top of that, too, everyone was just tremendous, I loved it.

However. Also according to CS.net, apparently there's yet ANOTHER Fast and the Furious movie being released. Because one wasn't bad enough. Now there's one (opening on 6/16, for those of you who unfortunately are interested in this) called The Fast and the Furious: Tokyo Drift. Guys, please. Just...quit.

Oh, and also? No one needs to see a film version of The Devil Wears Prada. Seriously.

But people, come on. The granddaddy of 'em all, the one we've all been waiting for (and okay, it was totally X3 before they hired Bret fucking Ratner...Ratboy...whatever the hell his name is to direct):

JULY 7, 2006: PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN: DEAD MAN'S CHEST

Thank you. /psa>

Hee, so Billeh said in a recent interview (from last Friday, I believe) that his and Dom's sooper seekrit movie o' doom is tentatively scheduled to start filming early next year. To which all I can say is that it's about damn time, and that standing and I will probably die of the squee long before we ever get to see it. Sigh.

The history test from hell last week actually went a LOT better than I'd anticipated. Somehow, despite royally fucking up a couple questions, I actually managed a B+ on it, so of course I did a miniature jig in class upon receiving my paper. And then proceeded to fall on my ass halfway between Harris and Corbly because me + bad shoes + gravity = WOE.

...So I've realized lately that writing lotrips has turned me into something of a potty mouth. Chelle? Did you have this problem, by chance? I used to be sweet and innocent, I swear. Honestly.

Ehm...wow, that made it sound really important, huh? haha anyway... I've had just about the worst day EVAR at work...where I still am....updating this...even though I could get in trouble for it...but screw it. So I figured I'd ask you for some recs. Particularly, I'm in the mood for monaboyd, particularly angry!monaboyd, because...well, because. it's hot boys yelling at each other and then shagging omg and that = hot.

Help?

Or me, in particular.

I just got off the phone with my very first Scottish customer. Very, VERY Scottish. Heee. I was hoping her name would be like, Mary McTavish or something, but nah, just normal. It was something like Julie Clarke or something to that effect. She was very sweet and had that awesome odd stress on random syllables, it was great. Monitoring be damned, I told her anyway that I loved her accent. She giggled and said "Thank ye!" Heee. *is in love*

So let's see. So far I've heard from two Canadians, several generically English people (sorry, I can't narrow it down any more than that), two Irish people (which was during the same call, a guy and his girlfriend, aww), three Australians, many many Mexicans, and now one Scot. There are undoubtedly some other nationalities I'm forgetting, but feh.

I don't know why this makes me happy.

Everyone knows this. And yet...and yet, his and Edge's snark fest tonight totally won me over.

Skeletor. Heee.

School is determined to kill me. KILL ME, I say.

Tomorrow I have a presentation in my science class. Tuesday I have a paper due and two tests in my other two classes that day. Ordinarily I wouldn't be too concerned with this, but my history class is draining the blood from my body. My teacher is insane and his tests are hideous. The ONE grade we have in the class so far is our first test, worth a hundred points and consisting of five IDs and an essay. I made a D on it. A D. It's our ONLY GRADE in the class so far.

I HAVE A "D" IN A CLASS FOR A SUBJECT I'M MINORING IN.

I am le suck.

Anyway, Wednesday they're doing this new "assessment day" stuff at school, so I thought I'd go down and see what it's about. If you attend different events you get tickets to enter raffles to win stuff like iPods, gift certificates, etc. And besides, the English major conference panel thing sounds kind of interesting, because I'm a dork, so I'll probably end up going.

Yesterday after work I decided to walk over the couple blocks to check out the big "block party" for the "We Are Marshall" crew coming to town. Honestly, I only went for the chance to see Mr. Sex-On-Legs Matthew McConoughey, but feh, I'd already missed him by then. I stood around for a while and watched a couple bands, got jostled by a bunch of drunken rednecks, then decided to head back to the car, only to get caught up in the INSANE traffic from that and the Kid Rock concert that coincidentally just happened to be at the civic center. Christ Almighty, it took me AN HOUR to leave work. It was insane, and totally not worth it.

And, to justify the use of my fangirl icon, I think tonight sometime I might upload my hobbits mood theme. I don't think I've quite shown the world the full extent of my dorkiness yet.

Comment with a title to a story that I didn't write. I'll reply with a few little details about the story-that-wasn't. And who knows, it might even spur me to write it in-depth. Include a fandom preference if you want, otherwise I'll go with whatever strikes my fancy.

Come on, people, humor me. DO EEET.